Unbelievable Luxury Awaits: Spain's Hidden Gem, Hotel Pago del Olivo!
Unbelievable Luxury? Yeah, Right… My Slightly-Dented, But Still Delightful, Stay at Hotel Pago del Olivo! (Spoiler: It's Mostly Good)
Alright, travel junkies, let's talk about the Unbelievable Luxury of Hotel Pago del Olivo in Spain. The brochure promised paradise. The reality? Well, let's just say it involved a few unexpected detours, a near-meltdown over a missing pastry, and a whole lot of delicious olive oil.
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Accessibility: The Good, the Bad, and the Slightly Bemused
Okay, first things first: Accessibility. This is HUGE for me because I'm always traveling with my Aunt Mildred (a self-proclaimed Queen of the Power Wheelchair) and her entourage of fluff-balls and emotional baggage. The website said "fully accessible!" which filled me with a cautious kind of hope. The reality? Mostly good.
- Here's a good thing! The ramps were plentiful (but not too steep), the elevators were, praise the travel gods, actually big enough for Mildred and all her luggage, and the bathrooms in the accessible rooms were genuinely accessible, not just a token gesture. (Seriously, I've seen bathrooms that were more of a daredevil obstacle course than a place of comfort).
- The slightly bemused: We did encounter one narrow doorway leading to the incredibly luxurious spa that Mildred could barely squeeze through. Seriously? A spa dedicated to relaxation should not require a contortionist. But hey, they fixed it the next day, so points for responsiveness!
On-site accessible restaurants / lounges: Yes, there was a restaurant that was accessible, but one of the lounges still seemed a bit cramped.
Wheelchair accessible: As mentioned!
Internet – The Lifeline (Mostly) - But Where's the LAN?!?
Internet Access: Praise be! Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Essential in this day and age. I have an addiction. I need to research restaurants, update my Instagram, and check my crypto portfolio. This hotel gets it. Internet [LAN]: Crickets. Where the heck is the LAN? In this day and age? Seriously, I was hoping to download a movie one night. Oh well, at least the Wifi was good most of the time. Internet services: Ok, so the internet was spotty at times, and I need my internet for all the reasons I already told you, plus I need that internet to research stuff for this review!
Things to Do, Ways to Relax, and My Attempt to Become a Spa Diva (Spoiler: Failed)
Alright, let's talk about the fun stuff. The brochure practically screamed luxe spa experience. And, I'm not gonna lie, I was ready. I’m easily lured by the promise of pampering.
- Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steam room, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]: The spa was… well, let's just say it was aspirational luxury more than pure perfection. The pool with a view lived up to the hype. Stunning infinity pool overlooking the olive groves, just as the brochure promised. Sigh. I spent hours there, and even got a tan - which is a huge win for me. The sauna was delightful. The massage… well, the masseuse was lovely (and very patient with my, ahem, requests), but I swear she kept giggling at my attempts to relax. The fitness center looked impressive…I may have skipped this entirely.
- Quirky Observation: The "relaxation room" was clearly designed by someone who doesn't understand the concept of quiet. There were people talking, phones ringing, you name it. Mildly infuriating. Also, the "foot bath" was more of a lukewarm foot soak.
Cleanliness…and the Great Sanitization Debate
The hotel was trying to get a grip on the cleanliness, if you will.
- Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment: The staff were very diligent.
- The Debate: All the cleaning did mean lots of the chemical smell, so you have an option to say "no" and have your room sanitized.
Dining, Drinking, Snacking, and the Case of the Missing Croissant
Food. The foundation of any good vacation. And Hotel Pago del Olivo mostly delivered.
- A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant: The Breakfast [buffet] was, at first, a glorious sight. The spread! The choices! But then, disaster struck. My favorite, the perfect, buttery, flaky Croissant was gone. Vanished! I swear I saw a rogue hotel staff member scoop up the last one and run. I may or may not have had a near-meltdown. (Mildred had to calm me down).
- Quirky Observation: The poolside bar bartender made a killer Bloody Mary, but he also insisted on telling me his entire life story… which, let's face it, wasn't as interesting as a croissant.
- Emotional Reaction: Despite the croissant incident, the restaurants were generally pretty great with a great choice of international cuisine and Asian cuisine. The room service [24-hour] saved me when late-night cravings hit. The Happy hour was definitely a highlight.
Services and Conveniences: Where Did I Put That Invoice? Plus, the Elevator
This is where the hotel showed its true colors.
- Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center: So, I may have misplaced my invoice. The concierge was incredibly helpful. The elevator was spacious. The doorman was very polite (and, bless him, didn't bat an eye at Mildred's overflowing floral hat and my frantic search for the lost croissant). The Air conditioning in public area was a lifesaver against the Spanish heat.
- Imperfection: The convenience store was more like a glorified snack kiosk with inflated prices.
For the Kids (and the Babysitting Service That Saved My Sanity)
- Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: I wasn't traveling with kids, but I could see this hotel being a hit with families. The babysitting service seemed great (according to other guests), and the kid-friendly facilities looked fun.
Access, Security, and the Occasional Creak
- CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Check-in/out [express], Check-in/out [private], Couple's room, Exterior corridor, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Hotel chain, Non-smoking rooms, Proposal spot, Room decorations, Safety/security feature, Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms, Soundproof rooms: All of this seemed fairly solid. I felt safe.
- Imperfection: My room wasn't perfectly soundproof. I could occasionally hear the couple next door, which was not ideal (but hey, it's a hotel).
Getting Around: The Perfect Solution for Mildred's Mobility Challenges
- Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking: The Airport transfer was super smooth. The car park [free of charge] was a major bonus.
Available in All Rooms: The Details That Matter (And the Ones That Don't)
- **Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk
Simancas Shenanigans: The Pago del Olivo Diary (or, How I Accidentally Fell for a Spanish Village)
Okay, let's be honest, this isn't going to be your perfectly curated travel itinerary. More like… my panicked scribbles, smeared with sangria and a healthy dose of existential dread (which, let's face it, is pretty much my default travel setting).
The Goal: Get through a week at Hotel Pago del Olivo in Simancas, Spain. Sounds idyllic, right? Well, we'll see.
Day 1: Arrival and Existential Dread… with Tapas!
- 14:00 - Arrival: The train ride from Madrid was surprisingly smooth. Except for the woman who kept trying to engage me in conversation about the “spiritual energy of the Iberian Peninsula.” Look, I'm here for the wine, lady, not a cosmic awakening. The countryside rolled by, a blur of ochre and green, and my anxiety levels decided to do the same – rolling. Then, the Simancas train station! Small, charming, and, dare I say, a bit lonely.
- 14:30 - Check-in at Pago del Olivo: Okay, first impressions? Wow. This place is gorgeous. The courtyard, all sun-dappled tiles and overflowing bougainvillea, is something out of a movie. The owner, a woman named Manuela (or at least, that's what I think she said… Spanish is a work in progress, like my life), is all smiles and enthusiastic gestures. I'm already overwhelmed. The room is lovely though, really beautiful. High ceilings, crisp white linens, a balcony overlooking… well, I'm not sure what yet, but it's promising. I also discovered a tiny, slightly aggressive, welcome basket of local snacks. Score!
- 15:30 – Navigating the Town (or, My Near-Death Experience with a Crosswalk): After dropping my bags, I attempted to find the famous Plaza Mayor. "Attempted" being the operative word. Simancas is deceptively… hilly? And the cobblestone streets are murder. My suitcase nearly took me out. Also, crosswalks? Forget about it. I swear, Spaniards have some kind of telepathic understanding of traffic that I clearly lack. Almost squashed by a tiny, vintage Seat. I’m thinking of making a travel insurance claim just for psychological damage.
- 16:30 - Tapas Time: Found a tiny bar, "El Rincón del Sabor" (The Corner of Flavor… I think?), and inhaled some pinchos. Tiny sandwiches of chorizo, manchego, and olives. Oh, the olives! Life-changing. Washed it all down with a glass of local Ribera del Duero. The perfect antidote to near-death experiences. Seriously though, the man behind the bar looked at me like I was a lost puppy. “¿Todo bien?” he asked. (“Everything okay?”) I’m pretty sure he could see the fear in my eyes. He seemed to understand.
- 18:00 - Back to Base: Needed to regroup. The Spanish sun is intense, and I'm already regretting my choice of a black dress. Spent an hour contemplating the meaning of life on my balcony (accompanied by the aggressive welcome basket snacks). Verdict: Still clueless.
- 20:00 – Dinner at the Hotel: I'm too exhausted (and slightly traumatized by the traffic) to venture out again. Dinner at the hotel. Hoping for something with less… danger.
Day 2: The Castle, the Chaos, and the Best Croquetas EVER
- 9:00 – Breakfast: Breakfast at Pago del Olivo is a little underwhelming. Lots of sugar, not much substance. The coffee, however, is excellent. Needed a lot of that this morning.
- 10:00 – Exploring the Castle (Castillo de Simancas): Okay, the castle. Spectacular. The views! Breath-taking. But also, a bit… overwhelming? I wandered through the ancient halls, imagining all the historical figures who had walked the worn stone floors. And then… I got lost. Seriously, in a castle. It's like history's worst maze. Found myself staring into a dusty, vacant room. I swear, I heard whispers. (Probably just the wind. Probably.)
- 12:00 - The National Archives (Archivo General de Simancas): The castle houses the Spanish National Archives. I’m, admittedly, not a huge history buff. But this place? Fascinating. Mountains of ancient documents. The weight of Spanish history… pressing down on me. Also, it's cold in there! Freezing!
- 14:00 - Lunch: The Croqueta Revelation at "Mesón El Torreón." This is the day it all changed. I found a little restaurant – "Mesón El Torreón" – tucked away on a quiet street. I ordered a plate of croquetas. And bam. My life was forever transformed. They are creamy, cheesy, crispy, and heavenly. It's a religious experience, and I suddenly feel like a changed woman. I ate them all… too quickly. And nearly ordered another plate immediately. And then, maybe should have, but decided to be a little more rational. I'd probably have stayed there all day…
- 16:00 – The Aftermath of the Croquetas and Siesta Time: I was so full of croquetas I could barely move. Time for a siesta (it's basically mandatory in Spain). Slept like a log.
- 18:00 – Strolling through Simancas: I managed a short walk as the sun began to set. Simancas is beautiful. It's easy to get lost in the beauty.
- 20:00 – Dinner: Back to Pago del Olivo for some more… less dramatic food. Tried to recreate the croquetas in my head. Failed miserably. (I'm going back tomorrow.)
Day 3: Wandering, Wine Tasting, & a Moment of Bliss (and Maybe a Few Tears)
- 9:00: Coffee on the balcony: The best part of my day, hands down. The early morning air, the view, the coffee.
- 10:00 Exploring the local markets: I wanted to get a taste of local flavor. So I explored the markets.
- 12:00 - Wine Tasting at a Vineyard outside Simancas: Signed up for a day trip to a local vineyard. The rolling hills, the dusty roads, the scent of grapes in the air… pure magic. The wine? Divine. And then, a moment where I just… broke down. Not in a bad way, but a good way, a really good way. The beauty of the surroundings, the taste of the wine, the realization that, despite all the chaos and the existential dread, I actually felt… happy. A few delicious tears, washed down with more of the delicious red.
- 15:00 – Lunch at the Vineyard: Local cheeses, cured meats, bread, more wine. This day is perfect.
- 17:00 – Back to Simancas: Returned to the hotel.
- 20:00 – Dinner at a restaurant on the Plaza Mayor: The Plaza Mayor is beautiful at night. I tried to order in Spanish. Failed miserably (again), but the waiter was lovely and patient. More wine was consumed.
Day 4: Lost and Found (and Lost Again)
- 9:00 - Panic Breakfast: Today I spent an exorbitant amount of time trying to find my way around Simancas.
- 10:00 – Attempted Hiking: Tried to go for a hike in the surrounding countryside. Got gloriously, epically, spectacularly lost. Ended up wandering through fields, encountering cows, and eventually, limping back to town, covered in dust and questioning all my life choices. The views were probably lovely, but mostly I was just focused on not getting eaten by a cow.
- 13:00 - Rest and Re-strategize: Back at the hotel. I’m going to need a bath. And maybe a map that actually works.
- 15:00 - Lunch at "Mesón El Torreón!!!" (Croquetas!) Yes. I had to. The craving was too strong. This time, I may have even ordered two plates. No regrets.
- 17:00 - More Lost-ness: Decided to explore the other side of town. Got turned around again.
- 20:00 - Dinner: A simple meal back at the hotel, accompanied by a book and a glass of wine.
**Day 5: A Day of Serendipity… or, The Day I
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Unbelievable Luxury Awaits: Yeah, Right... Hotel Pago del Olivo - FAQs (Because Let's Be Real, You're Curious)
Okay, Okay, So... What *Is* This Pago del Olivo Place, Anyway? Is it Actually Worth the Hype?
Alright, deep breaths. Let's be honest, the marketing photos are *gorgeous*. Like, magazine-spread gorgeous. Pago del Olivo (Olive Tree Payment? I don't speak Spanish, okay?) is this... supposed boutique hotel in, like, the heart of Andalusia. Think rolling hills, olive groves, and a promise of 'untouched luxury'. And... well, that's where it gets interesting. Yes, the *views* are stunning. Seriously, breathtaking. You could sit on your balcony (if you're lucky enough to get one - more on that later) and just... *breathe*. It's genuinely tranquil, at least initially. But... worth the hype? That depends. Prepare for some *very* Spanish "efficiency." (And I say that with love... mostly.)
The Rooms! What are they *really* like? Do I *need* a balcony?
The rooms. Ah, the rooms. They're stylish, no doubt. Modern, minimalist decor. Big beds (thank God, because after all that walking, you'll need it). The bathrooms... well, they're Instagram-worthy. Rainfall shower, the whole shebang. But here's the kicker: **request a balcony. Beg for it.** Seriously. I didn’t. Big mistake, massive, huge mistake. My room faced the service entrance! I spent the entire first morning listening to what it felt like to be a really loud garbage truck. You need that balcony for the views, the space to actually *breathe* the fresh air without being confined in a sleek box. And the sunrises! Supposedly magical. I wouldn't know. Curse you, service entrance.
The Food: Is it as incredible as they say? I need details! And is there a good wine selection?
Okay, the food. This is where things get... complicated. The chef, who's apparently some hotshot, is *talented*. The presentations are beautiful, the ingredients are fresh (mostly organic, I think they mentioned). But the menu? It's... adventurous. Let's just say I ate a lot of things I wouldn't normally touch (rabbit, anyone?). And the portions? Not exactly American-sized. I swear, one night I almost had to gnaw off my own arm because I was so hungry after the "seasonal vegetables." The wine selection, however, is excellent. Absolutely top-notch. You can get lost in the local Rioja, the Ribera del Duero... it's a wine-lover's paradise. Just… eat a big snack first, okay?
The Spa! The pics look divine. Should I book a treatment?
The spa... oh, the spa. It's a haven. Seriously. The pictures don't lie – it’s all hushed tones and flickering candles and those fluffy robes you never want to take off. And yes, you should absolutely book a treatment. Do it. Do it now! Especially the olive oil massage. It’s… transcendent. I almost fell asleep mid-massage, which, let's be honest, says a *lot* about my stress levels. Just be prepared for the spa music to be… a bit intense, new-age-y stuff, you know? The kind that makes you feel like you're floating on a cloud that's also made of essential oils. But hey, who's complaining? (Me, a little, initially. Then I completely gave in.)
What's the service like? I'm a high-maintenance traveler... is this place for me?
Alright, the service. *This* is where the "Spanish efficiency" rears its head. It's... charmingly slow, sometimes. Don't expect lightning-fast anything. Room service might take a while. Getting your bill? Might involve a small pilgrimage to the front desk. But the staff *are* lovely. Seriously, genuinely friendly and eager to please. It's just… a different pace of life. If you're the kind of person who needs every whim catered to *instantly*, this might test your patience. If, however, you can embrace the laid-back vibe and appreciate a good smile, you'll be fine. Just... pack some patience. And maybe a backup snack. Just in case. (See: tiny food portions.)
Is it kid-friendly? Should I bring the little darlings?
Hmm, "kid-friendly"... that's a tough one. They *say* they are. They have a kiddie pool and maybe a play area. But... the vibe is *very* romantic, very "escape from it all." I'm not sure I'd want to bring a screaming toddler to a place where I'm actively trying to zen out. Think about your sanity first. Maybe bring the kids somewhere else, or if you have them, make this a parent-only vacation, yeah?
Tell me about one memory or experience that made you want to punch a wall (or made you love it all the more.)
Okay, *this*. This one nearly broke me. I'd already had a rough day: no balcony, the garbage truck symphony... Anyway, I decided to order room service. Just a simple club sandwich. How hard could it be? Well, it took an hour and a half to arrive. An hour and a half! And when it finally did? It was... not a club sandwich. It was a sad, soggy collection of some mystery meats and wilted lettuce on slightly stale bread. I swear, I considered just giving up on life entirely. I stared out the window at the ugly service entrance (again). I was *hangry*, I was tired, and my perfectly curated vacation was slowly unraveling like a cheap thread. I almost went down to the front desk to complain, but I started thinking about all the wine I had in my mini-fridge. And you know what? I was still in Spain! Still in Andalusia! Still surrounded by beauty (even if I couldn't *see* it). And, alright, the waiter who delivered the sandwich? He was genuinely apologetic, probably mortified. And he offered me a free dessert, which was actually pretty good. It's not worth punching a wall, right? No. I let go. I poured myself some Rioja. And I ate that soggy sandwich. And I laughed. That's the Pago del Olivo experience in a nutshell, isn't it? It's beautiful, it's frustrating, it's imperfect… but it's real. And yeah, I loved it, despiteSmart Traveller Inns
